What Is Tantric Lovemaking? (Part II)

What did the ‘original Tantrikas’ have in mind?

So, lovemaking, in the eyes of those we might call some of the ‘original Tantrikas’ (and who exactly they are is debatable which is why I have created an entire series of interviews from teachers/gurus/etc from all different Tantric paths so you can get a broader understanding for yourself)... from my understanding both from research and also from what I feel to be true in my deepest being, is that the original Tantrics had a few essential perspectives on lovemaking...

1) What a freakin’ miracle! There was an awe and a reverence for something so sacred. An act that not only brought two human beings, two living aspects of the essential polarities on this planet (masculine/feminine) into union by the magical fact that their bodies fit perfectly together, but also created incredible pleasure, altered states leading to powerful meetings with the divine, generating of energy that could be used to nourish the body and heal AS WELL AS bring new life into the world! Wow!

2) From a more scientific exploratory perspective... wow, this act generates a LOT of energy. How can we play with and harness this energy to fuel our journey to enlightenment?

What does this mean for us now?

There is a powerful science that has been around for thousands of years that we can use and tap into to support us in feeling more fully alive, fuel our self-understanding, bring us to a more intimate connection with ourselves and ultimately completely transform the way we experience intimacy with our lover.

Taking lovemaking to another whole level where we enter into it with reverence, energetic intelligence and, love and we can truly experience the miracle of this UNION, this weaving together of the masculine/feminine (by the way, the translation of Tantra is ‘weaving’) and experience that weaving IN FORM, in our human bodies.. this union which is happening in all things, all the time. In every breath we take, in every interaction we have, every step we take (and, yes, this union, of course happens with same-sex lovers too).

Both the ancient and the modern Tantric begin to enter into a world where everything, even the most mundane activity, is an act of lovemaking, an expression of this union and therefore opens the door to great pleasure and intimacy.

How do we use this in our lovemaking?

A few basic steps:

1) We need to ‘clear the cobwebs’ in our bodies. Many, many Tantric practices support this process rather than being about the actual act of sex.

2) We learn to activate and awaken the sexual energy and allow it to move through and nourish the body (moving into the spaces that have been cleared through #1).

3) This process re-sensitizes the body and as we become more sensitive to ourselves, we are able to develop an attunement with our partner. It is this attunement which makes for great lovemaking. NOT a technique or a stroke or a special massage... it comes from the connection that is always happening, but often cannot be felt truly until we do steps 1 & 2

One Practice To Get You Started:

  • sit comfortably with your eyes closed
  • relax the jaw and begin to breathe in and out of the mouth
  • bring one hand to the belly, imagine that you have a sponge in your belly, inhale and allow the sponge to become full with the breath (allowing the belly to ‘swell’), exhale and pull the belly button back towards the spine, imagining that you are squeezing the air out of the sponge. Continue for several breaths
  • On an inhale, bring the arms up out to the sides to meet over the head, on an exhale let the arms drop down to the sides again
  • Begin to gently rock the pelvis as you breathe and move the arms up and down.  As you inhale rock forward on the sits bones (sticking the butt out); as you exhale rock ‘back’ curling the butt under.
  • If you want to add more: begin to allow the rocking of the pelvis to spread through the spine. Inhale stick the butt out, let the belly fall forward, let the chest press forward, let the head fall back and look up at your hands. // Exhale curl the butt under, pull the belly in, curl the shoulders forward, head drops to the chest. Repeat several times
  • If you want to add more & begin to bring in step 2, ‘activating’ the sexual energy: when you inhale (while still doing all of the above steps) add in pulling up through the pelvic floor as though you were stopping the flow of urine. Exhale and release the pelvic floor (while doing all of the other ‘exhale’ steps above as well).
  • After several repetitions, rest for at least 1 minute in silent meditation.

This is just the beginning. A first-step in re-sensitizing the body. Give it a try and let me know how it goes. I would love to hear about your experiences and thoughts! Leave a comment below. ;)

in love,
Charu

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