[Article] 'I was brought up to be ashamed of my sexuality...'

*You are reading a guest article from, Embody Tantra trained teacher Shivangi Bhatt.*

I sensed that my sexual desires and pleasures were sacred. But I was told that my body and my sexuality were “bad,” and to be conquered and transcended at all costs.


Hi! I’m Shivangi.  

I’m in love with my sexuality.

The capacity for pleasure and sexual energy in my body is such a blessing. It brings power, energy and vitality into my life. It nourishes and strengthens my body. It is something to be embraced and enjoyed. It can lead me to meditative states. It allows me to connect with my beloved on such a profound level – beyond words, beyond thoughts. And it connects me with my higher power in the sweetest, most sacred way. I am grateful for many things, but my sexuality is my favorite gift from the divine. 

This was not always the case for me. I was brought up to be ashamed of my sexuality. I do not blame anyone for this… the people around me carried old, ancestral shame with them, and they passed it to me as a tool for me to protect myself. But it never felt quite right to me. Deep inside, I sensed that my sexual desires and pleasures and my beautiful, sensual body were sacred. But outwardly, I was told, consciously and subconsciously, that my body and my sexuality were bad, something to be conquered and transcended at all costs.

I was taught that sensual pleasure of all kinds were to be mistrusted and avoided, especially sexual pleasure. That if I indulged in pleasure and let my sensuality shine, I’d stay tied to this body and not able to reach the divine; and even worse, people would notice my sexuality. And when they did, women would judge and ostracize me, and men would prey on me and hurt me. 

It’s only natural that I tried to hide the bright light of sexuality that shone in me, having received all of these scary messages about how bad it was. But I never was quite able to. And sadly, some of the predictions of my erstwhile teachers and well-wishers really did manifest. When I had the courage to reveal the flame that burned inside of me, I was judged, ostracized, and preyed on. And I became even more convinced that sexuality was a bad thing, to be hidden away and accessed only in secret.

Thank GOD I found Tantra. When I walked into my first Tantra retreat, I couldn’t believe how reverently people spoke of the magic of the body, the beauty of sensual pleasure, and the power of sexuality. How lovingly my teacher led us through exercises that generated the glow of sexual energy in our bodies and opened us up to how pleasure could be a meditative experience. My mind opened for the first time to the idea that my body is a beautiful gift from the divine, and that sex is God-given: something to be cherished and valued, not suppressed and avoided.

Through the Tantric practices, I have transformed my life. I have stopped waging war on a very natural and beautiful part of myself, and instead, have embraced it. I have been able to form a deeper connection with my higher power through loving my body and opening up to sensual pleasure. And Tantra has allowed me to call in and receive the most wonderful of men into my life, my beloved partner, who meets me with his divine masculine power and witnesses the fire of my sexual energy with reverence, as I do for him.

Today, my body is a gift to be loved and worshipped, and my sexual energy is a blessing to be embraced and trusted.This is the incredible gift I have received from Tantra.

 Were you brought up to be ashamed of your sexuality? Join us for the upcoming Awaken Weekend and be guided on a journey of rediscovering the brilliance of your body, embracing sensuality and sexuality and finding freedom from that shame.

The Awaken Weekend

October 5+6 . Los Angeles

*Singles + Couples Welcome



Who is Shivangi?

Shivangi loves to share the blessings of her personal journey and her Tantra practice in an effort to help members of her community live their very best lives. As the daughter of a Hindu priest and a Balavihar teacher, she was raised in an orthodox Hindu Brahmin household where she received a deep education on Hindu mythology, Vedantic philosophy, Indian classical dance and music, Gujarati, Hindi and Sanskrit.

Challenges with depression, anxiety, and addiction led her to turn away from religion and from God during early adulthood, but then Shivangi discovered a new relationship with her Higher Power as part of her own recovery. She feels blessed to have learned embodiment meditation, which connected her with her body, opened her heart, and helped her understand the sacred nature of her sensuality and sexuality. She recently completed her teacher training with Embody Tantra and teaches classes in Los Angeles.

Find Shivangi at her website: https://www.higherlovenow.com  OR insta: https://www.instagram.com/higher_love_now

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Posted on August 19, 2019 .