Posts tagged #vighyan bhairav Tantra

What Is Tantric Lovemaking? (Part II)

What did the ‘original Tantrikas’ have in mind?

So, lovemaking, in the eyes of those we might call some of the ‘original Tantrikas’ (and who exactly they are is debatable which is why I have created an entire series of interviews from teachers/gurus/etc from all different Tantric paths so you can get a broader understanding for yourself)... 

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The Secret to Great Sex

It has become clear to me that no matter what the exact issue that brings a client through my door, everyone is grasping for the secret to having a deeply fulfilling experience in lovemaking. People often want to believe or are searching out a technique that, once learned will finally satisfy their partner and transform their experience.

...and there are some techniques out there that are interesting and worth exploring, but the big secret is that great sex does not come from learning something you can 'do' differently.  It comes from how intimate you are with yourself.

Our culture has little tolerance for dedicating any time or energy to fully experiencing our bodies because we have become so result oriented.  God forbid we step away from our computer and the possibility of accomplishing one more thing, in order to nourish ourselves!

If we do take the time to nourish ourselves, it comes in the form of a spa treatment, a nice meal out, a ball-game, a Yoga class, etc.  And all of these things are WONDERFUL!  But how many of them really turn you on?  I mean how much of your life touches you in your sex?  Seriously, take a moment to think about it.  When you are not engaged in having sex what percentage of your life are you experiencing the wholeness of yourself including your sexuality?

...I thought so.  Way too little.

The worst part is that we have almost no experience of the potential of our bodies, no relationship to our own sexuality (other than a few goal-oriented masturbation sessions), and yet, we expect our partner to be able to satisfy us and take us to new heights... and if they can't, we whisper about it to our friends and long for our partner to change.

The good news is that getting in touch with your body and your sexuality is EASY.  Yes, it is.  Whew!  All it takes is a curiosity, an investment in those possibilities that you feel within you, but often don't listen to.

Try this:

Take the time for a walk in the park or on the beach, while you are there, take a moment to pause and be silent.  Allow yourself to notice what you feel through each sense in your body.  What do you smell?  How does the air feel when it touches your skin?  What colors and shapes do you see?  Sounds do you hear?  Allow yourself to truly absorb all of the sensations of the moment and through this begin to discover something new inside yourself and your relationship to all things.

"All around you, in every moment, The world is offering a feast for your senses.  Songs are playing, tasty food is on the table, Fragrances are in the air, Colors fill the eyes with light.

You who long for union, Attend this banquet with loving focus.  The outer and the inner worlds open to each other..."

~Vighyan Bhirav Tantra as translated by Lorin Roche Ph.D.

It is so simple that it is almost deceptive because we are not accustomed to allowing life to be simple.

And it is from this place of truly feeling ourselves in a new way, and coming into intimate contact with the world within and without that the great secret to lovemaking is revealed: attunement.

Yup.  No special technique, no following steps 1,2,3 and boom!  As you become more intimate with yourself you will naturally become more intimate with the world.  As you become more intimate with the world you will begin to notice how to simply allow yourself to come into an attunement with this moment in your body.  As you attune to the moment, you become more sensitive to, and can easily attune to your partner.  It is from this place that true lovemaking happens.

As you become more and more sensitive, you will even begin to 'hear' what your partners body is telling you.  A longing for a caress here, an invitation for a deeper more vigorous movement, a call to slow down, and so on.  You become one of those rare people that you have heard of in the myths that friends have told you about that past lover who just magically knew what to do, how to touch and who drove them wild.

You can only become aware of these responses in your partner, you can only come into this level of attunement when you have an intimate relationship with yourself.

In many ways you will practice this attunement in every moment of your life.  Life becomes your greatest lover, even just the breath moving in and out of the body is recognized as the sweet pleasure that it is, and sharing with another human being is a delicious expression of this loving.

Want to use this article? You can as long as you include the following: Charu Morgan has dedicated her life to Tantra. Over the past 10 years she has studied and shared Tantra worldwide.  Best-known for her candid Memoirs of a Tantrika blog and her down-to-earth approach, she is committed to educating modern minds on the ancient secrets of Tantra through coaching, events & home-study courses.  If you would like to discover how Tantra can Transform your life, register online for the Memoirs of a Tantrika weekly ezine at and receive your free audio report Better Sex, Richer Life through Tantra.

Upcoming Events with Charu

Beginner Tantra for Couples

Sunday August 9th 6pm . Culver City
$100 per couple / $75 when you register before July 26th click here to register:

Evening of Awakening . Puja Ritual

Saturday August 15th 7-11pm $60 per person / $50 if registered before Aug 1st
click here to learn more & register

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Understanding Lovemaking through Music

Sutra 41 . Vighyan Bhairav Tantra "While listening to stringed instruments, hear their composite central sounds; thus omnipresence."

While the meditation on it's own may not sound very sexy, the outcome of an evening dedicated to re-sensitizing to the essence of sound may introduce you to a new way of making love.

There is a point, while listening, when the outer music becomes an inner music...a simple act becomes a meditation.

How have you been listening?

Have you been turning to your music as a drug, a sedative? Hoping that the tune would transport you away from the pain? Away from the mundane of everyday life? Has your music been an escape? How have you been making love?

Has your lovemaking been an attempt to fill your lonliness? Has it been an opportunity to chase the intense sensation of orgasm? Have you used it for stress release? Manipulation? Amunition for blame about one thing or another?

Have you missed the meditation? The inner music? The resonance with life that lovemaking has offered you? Have you railroaded past the heart of lovemaking where two beings meet and the divine is effortlessly revealed?

"While listening to stringed instruments, hear their composite central sounds; thus omnipresence."

Tomorrow night, Jan 7, in the Tantra Life class we will explore several meditations to re-sensitize you to your body, to those around you, and to the richness of the moment. From this space of renewed sensitivity, allow the music to touch you like a lover, to gently invite your rememberance of the simple pleasure that is available to you in every moment.

Leave with a new understanding of music and of possibilities in loving.

Looking forward to seeing you there. See details below.

in love, Charu Tantra Life! Wednesdays Jan 7- Feb 18 (skipping Jan 28) 7:30-9pm / $30 per person @ Sacred Energy Arts 220 Pier Ave Santa Monica CA 90405 *pre-registration is not necessary Tantra is a powerful path of meditation which focuses on bringing awareness and presence to the body

Learning to integrate Tantra and live a Tantra Life is a process of surrender. That process is facilitated by the meditations. Practicing them on your own is a part of it, and gathering together to immerse ourselves in the essence of who we are is a sure-fire way to accelerate the process....not to mention how fun and delicious it feels.

This weekly class is my offering to you, a chance to spend at least an hour and a half a week immersed in Tantra. I invite you to leave your mind at the door and allow this to be your vacation from your life as you know it. A place where you can allow yourself to be surprised by the possibilities and experience yourself fully as we explore one of the 112 Tantric meditations.

*all classes are fully clothed with no sexual contact

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Sensuality and Your Spine...

This week the focus in on the Sutra: "Place your whole attention in the nerve, delicate as the lotus thread, in the center of your spinal column. In such be transformed." ~Shiva / Vighyan Bhairav Tantra

How often do we really think about what we are made of?

This vessel that we call the body...this intricate machine that holds in it a person with hopes and dreams and dramas. This miraculous body with skin that will actually grow back together when we cut it, muscles that adapt as we stretch and strengthen them, a heart that pumps blood through our veins every moment of every day.

We live in a world that has become completely disconnected from the body. The way we handle medicine, birth, eating, lovemaking is shocking. Guns are legal and being naked is not....I could go on and on...

Beyond any spiritual or political journey or attitude, we are missing out on the best, most delicious elements of life.

As much as we have unconsciously disconnected, our bodies have faithfully stored all of our lifes' experiences. Our pleasures and pains. Pockets of un-felt feelings live in our tense joints and joys yet to be experienced lie waiting just beyond protective layers.

One of the keys to coming back home to the body is awakening the spine. The spine carries the messages from the brain to the body and body to brain. It has long been acknowledged in ancient traditions as the connection between heaven and earth.

This week in class we will re-discover the wisdom of our spine and allow it to gently invite us home to our bodies.

Try this meditation:

  • Sit in a comfortable seated position and become aware of the breath moving in and out of the body
  • Begin to rock the pelvis forward and back
  • Allow the spine to follow the pelvis...feeling the snake-like movement originating from the pelvis and traveling up the spine
  • connect the movement with your breath and experiment with a range from a big rocking motion to tiny imperceptible movements.
  • after 5 minutes allow the body to come to a stillness and sit silently for 5-10 minutes

Begin to discover the power and the sweetness of allowing energy to move through the spine.

in love,


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