This week all of our teachers in training are teaching their first self-produced practice class. Each of these trainers have been devoted students and practitioners for many years with me and I am so excited for them to take this next step!
I remember when I first dreamed of teaching Tantra. I imagined a life constantly immersed in retreats and classes with the incredible opening, freedom and aliveness that a Tantric container can bring forward in us. I imagined my body relaxed and open, and an overflow of sharing.
Once, early in my training, one of my teachers almost lost her computer. I remember her saying to me something like, 'Wow, my whole life is on that computer, I don't know what I would have done!'
...and I thought to myself, 'What does she mean? Her whole life is in the classroom and on retreat... what could possibly be so important on that computer?
(Please give me a break and remember I was only 25 and had been traveling with just a backpack for a few years and working random receptionist jobs upon arriving in LA.)
It didn't occur to me how much work it takes to secure those magical venues in which to have retreats and classes, it didn't occur to me the work that goes into promoting events so people know about them and decide if they want to attend, it didn't occur to me the endless follow up necessary to make sure people complete their registrations, the individuals who need special support via email, the rosters that track who paid what, the lists of names and phone numbers to follow up with...and on, and on and on.
Deciding to learn to teach Tantra for these amazing men and women is not only about learning how to hold a space for awakening and transformation. It's not just about learning how to guide a practice in such a way that people understand the instructions. It's not even just about being honest, authentic, living their practice and sharing vulnerably.
In many ways this moment in their journey is about their relationship to the world. What it actually takes to bring this practice, that has been so dear to them and powerful for their own journey, into the world.
The world is dense. It is technical. Humans today are pulled in so many different directions it's a dance to help those who will be your students identify that this is something worthy of their time and money.
These trainers have to face their own fears of being seen, of not being good enough, and then explore being in the world and doing it anyway.
I am so very proud to watch each of them navigate the internal challenges as well as the very real external challenges of producing events that people actually come to AND enjoy.